What is love?

What love is frankly I haven’t understood yet at 33, one thing I know for sure, is that when you’re in love you experience sometimes disturbing bipolar phases. We pass from the joy and the explosive happiness, that anyone sees you, even those who really don’t know you know that you are in love .. know that in your eyes that spark, those little stars are because your heart emanates a crazy aura, until you finish always angry, depressed, suffocated by a situation sometimes too narrow, as if you are going shopping you are a size 14 and you insist on buying a 10 with the hope that you enter, but this is not … Love makes you live of those situations that, for better or for worse, mark you and remain imprinted, if you meet a person in love, but really in love, not with those who are fixed only with sex, he will tell you, being in love and loving is a wonderful thing .. but the It’s really? For years I have been searching for true love, the love for film, the one to miss the breath, the one that makes you think only of him, what your world only turns around Love, which makes you daydream , and that makes you look at the future with pink eyes .. Instead until now, I have done nothing but meet people who have deluded me, used and thrown away as if I were a sheet of paper, where to write a script and then realize that does not really like it and throws away, now all these “people” are married, have children, travel, have created a future with those dreams that once were mine, ours .. making me become cynical, making me lose all confidence in the word Love, making me believe that for me there is not that right person .. But I wonder, does the right person really exist? or they are stereotypes that we create as children, a bit like when we went to buy Barbie’s husband.For me as a child, my prince had to resemble the prince of Cinderella, growing up instead I realized that I was a bit like Belle, I was looking for love in hearts of stone, in Beasts to transform into wonderful principles, a pity that some once transformed they became assholes and disappeared. Although many don’t believe it, my heart has stopped beating, and now more than a disney princess I feel like Dave Jones of The Pirates of the Caribbean, my heart after several, disappointments is there in a box waiting for someone find the key ..

I loved, and perhaps too much, because in love as in friendship, I give all of myself, now that I think about it is also in the family but these are details, I loved without being loved, I gave all of myself, and even today, that of love I say I don’t want to know, I love without being loved, I keep wondering why? why do I want to hurt myself? for what purpose .. considering that later, he will disappear, he will return to another or worse, he will spit in my face what he has never actually tried for me, what I really wonder, do I really need this? Since I am happy even so, without anyone? and why should I be ashamed of my happiness? why if I answer that my priorities are now other people look at me as if I were a monster? Of one thing I am certain at 33, I love my life, I love being able to drop everything whenever I can, get on a plane and fly to the other side of the world without having to explain to anyone, I love going to the movies alone, listening to everything the film without anyone disturbing me, I love going shopping without being permanently controlled, I love my niece who is the center of my universe, I love my friends so much as to be oppressive, I love my family so much to devote all my energy to them. Because this is also love, because love is not just about having a half to contemplate, because the most important thing is to love yourself .. and if love doesn’t come amen I personally take another trip …

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